Say What?!?

I remember my second week in rehab, we were having a group discussion about something I couldn't remember today if you put gun to my head. I mean, I was only was eight days sober. I didn't even know who I was. Half the day I felt like I was underwater. The other half I felt locked up like a veal. Anyway, we were in a group discussion and somebody said something that I didn't agree with. I have no idea what it was but to break the tedium I raised my hand. When called upon I quietly disagreed then put my head in a book. The speaker took exception with my remarks. "You really should pay attention when someone older then you in the program speaks. Close your mouth and open your ears." Instinctively, my head came out of the book and I stared incredulously at....whoever, and responded. "You're here, what? A month? Now you're the king of the drunks and drug addicts?!?" I'm not really sure what happened next but I found myself in the administrator's office.

Is it just me or do most people with a microscopic bit of experience in a given thing believe themselves to be the authority in that thing. Then become compelled to instruct you in all phases of that thing whether you wish to be instructed or not. Know-it-allism isn't a rare phenomenon. It's epidemic, particularly with the advent of social media. Everybody knows...everything. As I ponder this I think, is it cultural? Is it an American thing or do dudes in Botswana jump to give any asker directions to the diamond mines? Is it biological? Are humans born with an innate sense of superiority ie. the lady who jumps in a cab at the airport only to command the driver to take what she believes will be the fastest route to the upper east side. Is it a learned behavior? Were our chosen mentors assholes so we grew up socially adapting those traits? Regardless of the reason, how do we curtail it. How do you stop the first class passenger from telling the flight attendant how to do his job? How do you stop the guy in the diner from telling the waitress how the cook should prepare his patty melt? How do you stop the actor from telling us how the United Nations should be run? Honestly, I don't think you can. I don't think you can because the necessary ingredient to take the wind out of fake sails is humility. And humility is one of the seven virtues that took the last train to the coast.

In my lifetime I've learned a lot about humility. Sometimes willingly and sometimes because it was thrust upon me. I wish I could tell you that those lessons have made me free of arrogance and superiority. They haven't. But they have lessened it. There are three words I have learned to say that have helped me tremendously: "I don't know." I may have a hunch or suspicion. I may even know a tiny fragment. But the truth is, I am an expert on very little. When I don't know, I ask or read and I learn. I've found that makes for a much healthier Giraffe. If I can impart one wee bit of wisdom to my granddaughter it's this: DON'T be a Penguins fan and DON'T know everything.